Sunday, May 2, 2010

There Are Only Seven Jokes - Category 4

      Although Category 4, distortion of pronunciation, is probably home to some non-ethnic jokes, I couldn’t find any. Because I promised an example for every category, I submit the following with my sincerest apologies:

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Leroy is given a homework assignment. Still befuddled by the whole school thing, Leroy is a trooper. He was given another set of vocabulary words to use in sentences.

      Here's what he handed in:

HONOR ROLL - We was playin poker on the stoop the other day, man I was HONOROLL.
DISMAY - I went for a blood test, the doctor pulled out a big needle. He said, "DISMAY hurt a little."
OMELETTE - Every time I start a new job, OMELETTE go after a week.
DEFENSE - I ran from the cops, and hopped DEFENSE and got away.
LOCKET - I slam the door so hard, I LOCKET.
DOMINEERING - My girl's birthday was yesterday, I got her a DOMINEERING.
KENYA - I needed change for the subway, so I axe a stranger KENYA spare some change.
DERANGE - DERANGE is where da deer and antelope play.
DATA - At my basketball game, I scored thirty points. My coach said, "DATA boy!"
COPULATE - I called 911 and an hour later when they show up, I said, "COPULATE!"
BEWARE - I asked the man at the unemployment office, "Is this BEWARE I get a job?"
COATROOM - The judge said, "One more outburst like that, and you'll be thrown out the COATROOM."
DECIDE - I like Wanda and Yolanda, but I like to have a couple of babes on DECIDE.


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As always, I ask my readers to click on the “Comments” button below, and add any thoughts, additions or jokes they may have to the list. The category for tomorrow is distortion of language construction.

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      Through the power of speech, the Spirit was able to create religion, architecture, music, democracy, love, altruism, and all those achievements which we judge to be good. Unfortunately, since the Spirit praises the act rather than the results of creating, it also brought forth murder, incest, wars, hatred, jealously, AIDS, and other pestilences.
      The Wisdom Of Genesis – The Spirit Runs Through It.

The book and/or a free look inside is available in paperback or on Kindle at Amazon

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